V

The Way

In the essay Verse 82 a prescription for how to live was offered that was inspired by the wisdom of the Tao Te Ching. In that essay it was suggested that two opposing ways of living were equally legitimate. It was also suggested that both ways of living were equally distant from any goal a person might have toward finding their way to an ultimately unfindable Godforce or Source. Now, in this essay, we will examine another tool for understanding the unobtainable nature of an Ultimate Source - an Ultimate Source that this study of tarot and consciousness calls The Absentia. The Absentia is called The Absentia because... The Absentia isn't here! By design... it is characteristically and necessarily absent from any universe attempting to conceive of it, and is therefore eternally unobtainable, even as a concept in a mind. The way it remains unobtainable, even as a concept of a mind is to be found only through the phenomenon of Paradox. By using paradoxes that cycle endlessly back and forth, or around and around, between self-nullifying, interdependently incompatible opposites that can never be resolved, Paradox becomes the closest a contemplative mind will ever get to finding the unfindable Absentia.

By The Absentia not being here... we are. Thus, The Absentia births a Universe of opposites.

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The Way Diagram

In the diagram presented below, we see how opposites of life emerge from a Unity of Identity or Autonomy that is the diametrical opposite to another Unity of Uniformity. In the Unity of Identity, each manifest entity becomes the center of a unique universe - creating ME. In the Unity of Uniformity, all parts of nothingness are seen as one and the same - creating WE. In the essay Be Gray Every Day, these two unities are united, via paradox, to represent the Ultimate Unity of... The Absentia. In that essay, the concept of Enlightenment is expanded, to differentiate between our realization of Identity, versus our realization of Uniformity, versus our realization of Absentia - the three Unities. In this new schema, Enlightenment is seen as a realization of Identity and the Light of manifest existence at its most primal level. Realization of Uniformity and the Darkness of empty nothingness from which everything is birthed is referred to as Endarkenment. Ultimate realization of The Absentia... through the miracle of Paradox that sits between, and unites these two halves of life and death, is referred to as Engrayment. The diagram below maps out the road we take on our way to realizing these various forms of Unity (see the essay The Three Unities elsewhere on this site).

On this map of The Way, we see two things. We see how the opposites that influence our lives emerge from concepts of Unity, as well as how reduction of opposites leads us back to an ultimate Unity in Absentia. In this way, The Way remains two directional. By being a road that offers two directions of passage, this map is both a way to Engrayment, as well as a map of the here and now... of the One Reality which can carry us in either of two directions - to Humanity or Divinity (see the essay The Totality of Reality elsewhere on this site). Enlightenment, Endarkenment, Engrayment... life and living... as one or many; tools of perception come in many guises.

The Way. This diagram is a blend of other diagrams seen elsewhere around this site, like those found in the essays Totality of Reality, The Three Unities, Stop Being So Human and Be Gray Every Day. All of those essays describe portions of The All Things Are Numbers Way.

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The Ending of All Suffering

There are a lot of "philosophies for living" to choose from out there in the world. Some of the more spiritual philosophies of the world have clearly stated goals like... ending all of human suffering. Some want to empower us. Some want to spread love across the land. Some want to provide hope, and will claim to cure cancer. Some try to promote faith by trying to prove the existence of God. In the process of putting forth their ideas, many of these philosophies will also make the claim of attempting to look at things as they really are. But... with such clearly stated goals, they often end up distorting what they find if it doesn't quite fit the stated purpose of the philosophy - like ending suffering, empowering, spreading love, offering hope or proving the existence of God etc.

When I first set out to invent an underlying structure for a tarot deck, all I wanted to do was organize some thoughts in a more systematic way than I had seen in any of the books I had read up to that point regarding the nature of tarot. I had not read that much about philosophy - and still haven't. So, in my naive state, I did not adopt any such goals as ending suffering, empowering others, spreading love, curing cancer or proving the existence of God! All I wanted to do was explore the nature of my own existence to try and see it as it really is. The book All Things Are Numbers ends with a few thoughts about spirituality, the meaning of life, and ideas about Divinity, but most of the book is devoted to describing an evolving form that is not so much rooted in explaining anything but existence itself. My stated goal is, and has always been, to steer clear of bias whenever and wherever possible - even though it's not always possible. Thus, the lack of love, and hope, and empowerment found within the ideas being presented on this site might make its philosophy unpopular among the masses looking for such things. The idea that the philosophy being presented on this site does not offer a prescription for ending individual or collective suffering, nor a cure for cancer, nor a proof for the existence of God, might make it less interesting. But... avoiding bias is important to me. That is my bias. And so, as in so many places around this site, I present an alternative to things that are considered more popular.

If ideas being presented on this site can be used to end suffering, cure cancer, spread love and hope or help find God, that's great. In fact, I could well imagine how this idea of mapping out reality as a road extending away from the unities of Uniformity and Identity, and back again, might indeed fulfill one or more of those needs. But ultimately, the goal is to better understand the nature of our existing existence - the parts of The Way we experience as Humans living a life. The goal here is not the one way goal that so many spiritual philosophies have - to get the hell out of our manifest "prison," to a place we think will have greener grass. The goal is not to end suffering or spread love. The goal is to understand all of it, from one end to the other - as a two way street.

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It's a Two Way Street

The problem with a lot of philosophies, especially the spiritually oriented ones, is how they attempt to put people on a one way path away from Humanity and toward Divinity. The ones that have a bias of ending all human suffering will usually suggest that notions of good and bad be abandoned, as if a willful denial of our human nature, will make us divine. The ones devoted to understanding reality will suggest that our human perceptions and human ideas of reality are a deceptive illusion and that the only true reality is a divine reality. Once again, it is suggested that if we simply deny our humanness, it will make us divine. While the idea of denial may seem unappealing, logically speaking, such a path away from being human is needed, in order to become divine. The question is whether such a destination should be our only goal in life. The question is whether we should only follow a one way path, or whether we are legitimate beings no matter where we are upon this road. Both of these ideas can be found in the Way diagram above... but, with one exceptional difference. In the Way diagram above, the road between Humanity and Divinity is not one way.

Many of the spiritual philosophies come with an extreme bias toward "knowing" or being "one" with some notion of Divinity, or "God," as some call it... or "Him." In building a philosophy with such a bias, they typically construct a hierarchy of ideas that place our human nature in a lowly realm of filth, and the divine in an exalted realm of absolute perfection. The Way diagram above has been oriented to appease those of this mentality. To those of this mentality, the Way diagram would be incorrectly oriented if it were turned upside down, or drawn horizontally. But... in this study of The Way, orientation could be in any of several directions and still make perfect sense, because... in the philosophy being presented on this site, no single state is any more exalted than another. Ideas like The Absentia may be considered somewhat special in their transcendent nature, but it is not the goal of the philosophy being presented on this site to convince anyone that Divinity is superior, and that their human nature is inferior, wrong, a burden, a fall from grace, a cosmic mistake, filth to be washed away, a prison to escape, or a cloak of suffering to be abandoned. The philosophy being presented on this site sees The Way as a two way street (see What is an Archetype and Content + Context = Meaning elsewhere on this site).

I started out trying to understand my own existence. Eventually I had to explore the other end of this two way street, and understand things like Nothingness and The Absentia. But, unlike so many others, I did not return from that journey to see my human nature as something inferior to be abandoned. Is this wrong? Have I made a mistake? Am I unenlightened? Instead of preaching an abandonment of things like opposites, I continue to embrace opposites for all they can show me about Humanity. I also embrace things like Oneness, as well as things beyond Oneness, like... the paradox of The Absentia, for all that these things can show me about Unity and Divinity. To me it is all One Reality, to be known and utilized in its entirety.

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The Way

The Way, is a two way street. We came from one end, into a state of manifest existence. But... life is hard and painful in our fragile bodies, and even more fragile minds. So... people look for a way out. Enter... spiritual philosophies that point us back, into the womb of creation, as a direction that promises to restore us to a state of comfort that transcends bodies and minds. But... in order to return to that womb, we need to stop being so human.

Step 1: No Good or Bad. For those who think that indeed I am unenlightened to not view my human form as a prison to escape, or as filth to be washed away, the Way diagram is correctly oriented as vertical. Like the Qabalah (utilized by so many tarot decks), the Way diagram puts the mundane at the bottom and the Divine at the top, with a progression of opposites between. At the bottom we find what enlightened people mostly consider to be the most primitive, unenlightened, Human way of thinking - i.e. good versus bad. For many, declaring anything to be good or bad is to perpetuate all human suffering. Those who like or dislike anything... those who love or hate anyone, are said to be motivated by fear... fear of death (see Stop Being So Human elsewhere on this site). Thus, The Way to enlightenment - or what this study of tarot and life calls engrayment (see comments above) - is to abandon all notions of good and bad (see Be Gray Every Day elsewhere on this site).

Step 2: Don't Value Life. The next section of the Way diagram is about the opposites that come from examining any manifest entity - exclusive of any good or bad judgments. The five sets of opposites shown come from The Five Ways of Being used to describe any manifest thing: Up/Down, Left/Right, Front/Back, In/Out and On/Off (see The Planetary Model elsewhere on this site). These directions of orientation are used in numerous locations around this site, most instructively as Quintagrams, which can be utilized to describe the compound influence of opposites upon any manifest entity, or our Human psyche (see Numbers In Space elsewhere on this site). These Quintagrams are positioned on the LIGHT side of the Way diagram, because they are used to describe the binary aspects of LIFE. Our human nature to survive death makes us characteristically asymmetrical, thus, the Way diagram is asymmetrical in its design at this stage. Surviving death then becomes another concept to be abandoned on our way to engrayment.

Step 3: Abandon Opposites. As the binary opposites of life compound to create a Quintagram, the Way diagram also illustrates the characteristically human nature of segmenting existence into digestible portions for conscious consumption. Some see complexity as an inevitable evolution from that of simplicity, and segmenting as a natural byproduct of complexity. Thus... we invent words, Quintagrams, and tarot cards to parse reality into little bits. However, on a path to engrayment, this kind of analytical thinking is considered misguided. As our upward progress suggests, we should abandon complexity for the simplicity of Unity (see The Three Unities elsewhere on this site). But, while many may view a path to Unity as progress, this diagram views it more as a path of regress, backward in evolution, to a more unified beginning - illustrated by the un-segmented square of LIGHT at the top of the diagram. It likewise, views the binary evolution from that simplicity as progress - illustrated by the square of LIGHT being progressively more and more segmented. To many this is unenlightened. To many, we are a mistake, and it is considered progress to destroy or wash away that mistake by moving up... toward Unity.

Step 4: Abandon Life. The next section of the Way diagram is about the Unity that we are meant to find by abandoning opposites. Except... once we arrive, we find that there is in fact more than one form of Unity! (see The Three Unities elsewhere on this site). The first unity we encounter, upon abandoning the opposites of Quintagrams, is the unity of our Self as the center of our universe. Because we are still alive, the only unity we can really "know" is the one that defines our living Self, as a being of LIGHT. Thus, as an additional step toward our ultimate goal of engrayment, we are instructed to abandon life itself. To cling to life is unenlightened. Actually... to be perfectly precise, this study would consider the Unity of the Self to be absolutely enlightened... at least... relative to a path that is moving toward an ultimate goal of engrayment! To this study, enlightenment means the understanding of the Unity, Autonomy and Identity of Life, Self and Light. An admirable accomplishment in and of itself. But... as long as there is more to be found beyond the Self and Life and Light, some would still consider us to be pathetically Human. Thus, we are instructed to abandon LIGHT and Life.

Step 5: Abandon Death. Once we have abandoned life for death, we understand how the nothingness of the infinite continuum makes us all the same. The uniformity of the DARK is a form of oneness that many consider hierarchically superior to that of the identity of the Self bathed in LIGHT. Thus, we are instructed to abandon the "ME" of the Self for the "WE" of a Universal Consciousness and dissolve into the nothingness from which our manifest Self emerged. But, for those who believe that death only leads to reincarnation on a wheel of endless reincarnations, it would appear that absolute abandonment of opposites has not been achieved, and, indeed, might be completely impossible to achieve (see Reincarnation elsewhere on this site). Thus, we acknowledge one more thing to abandon... the life and death cycle itself. For many, to no longer be reincarnated is to be truly enlightened - or as this study calls it engrayed. This study calls this illusive state "Engrayment" because it is a state of "being" that resides in an impossibly unobtainable "place" between the light of life and the dark of death (see Be Gray Every Day elsewhere on this site). Only by understanding this impossible state, and by embracing the impossible nature of it, through things like paradox, does our psyche, or consciousness, come to realize the necessity of abandoning the life and death cycle itself. Paradox is the only way to enter a cycle of infinity, and it is also the only way to exit a cycle of infinity (see The Law of the Predictable Paradox elsewhere on this site). So... to get off the wheel, we need to embrace the paradox of The Absentia.

Step 6: Stop Being So Human. Once we transcend the life and death cycle, we are no longer Human... we become Divine! We trade our Relative Human Attachment for Absolute Divine Detachment... we trade our Imperfect Human Asymmetry for Perfect Divine Symmetry... we trade ordinary Oneness or Unity for the Paradox of The Absentia... and cease to exist, relative to any Universe... we trade the possible for the impossible, and stop being so human (see Stop Being So Human elsewhere on this site). This is how we end all human suffering... by not being human! NOW are we happy?

Step 7: Come Back to Life. For those who want to stop being Human and become Divine, this path is there. But, on this path, there remains the question of whether being Divine is all there is, or... whether, in fact, the Divine might, itself, long to become Human as much as some humans long to become Divine. The fact that we are here at all might suggest that in fact the Divine does have some kind of cosmic "desire" or... logically inevitable circumstances that would dictate an unavoidable force directed toward becoming Human, and that the path to engrayment is indeed a path of regress that goes against the current of creation. Which way to go is up to each individual. Personally, I see it all as One Reality with equal benefits in either direction. To some - particularly those who think they will end Human suffering by prescribing a path of regress - i.e. going upstream in regression, to the source of our creation, such a path might be viewed by others as comparable to a traumatized psyche wanting to crawl back into the womb of its mother, instead of dealing with the life it has been given (see Verse 82 and Consider the Source, elsewhere on this site). Some people suffer much worse than others, so the need to pursue this kind of mindset is understandable. But is it really a superior way for Humans to go? I say go either way and find something worthwhile in both directions. Abandon life and living... go upstream and become Divine, or go downstream and contribute to a socially constructed reality of good and bad things. Everyone has a place in this Universe. If one feels trapped in their own skin, or views life as a prison, and wants to declare that our only purpose in life is to get the hell out of here, back to Divinity... no one is wrong.

No one is wrong if they go upstream, back into the womb of creation. No one is wrong if they want to acknowledge the binary nature of Life and deal with the infinite subjectivity of relativistic thinking that comes with a Life-biased mind declaring things good or bad depending on how they effect survival. One thing to watch out for though, is the way people conflate the transcendent qualities of being Divine with the mundane qualities of being Human, and subsequently impose human notions of "goodness" upon the transcendent notions of Divinity. This is a very common mistake that comes from our Life-biased inability to completely follow the instructions just given and abandon both Life and Death. But, in the end, this is a "Coming back to Life" that can confuse things and lead to unwanted hypocrisy in our descriptions of what is. At the same time, though, it is also a very natural outcome that results from encountering the unobtainable nature of Divinity and "bouncing" back to Life, without ever realizing our failure to obtain the unobtainable, but instead thinking that we did obtain Divinity and know it to be Life and Goodness. Whether knowingly or unknowingly, people want the best of both worlds, so... in their minds, a Divinity transcends opposites to become something that is Good... not Bad. Which makes us Happy... not Sad. So we think it to be correct, because it feels correct in its goodness. But is this a distortion of what really is? The Sacred Geometry being utilized in this study of consciousness would suggest that it is. So, as an alternative, this study of consciousness chooses to stop at the realization of what is, rather than distorting things to make people happy.

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The Way Mandala

Here is a mandala we can use to meditate on this idea of finding something worthwhile in either a progressive or regressive path along The Way. At the top are The Three Unities: L=Light, D=Dark, G=Gray/OuterAbsentia (God). At the bottom is another trinity, of mundane activity: L=Life, D=Death, G=Gray/InnerAbsentia (God). Between the two are The Five Ways of Being: Up/Down, Left/Right, Front/Back, In/Out and On/Off, with illustrations borrowed from The Dream Analysis Calculator. To the left and right of The Five Ways of Being are: B=Bad Negative, G=Good Negative, G=Good Positive and B=Bad Positive - a spectrum of possibilities.

With the concept of "moderation... in moderation" as our guide (see the essay Be Gray Every Day elsewhere on this site), our focus should be on God's Gray Graces.

At the top are The Three Unities: L=Light, D=Dark, G=Gray/OuterAbsentia (God). At the bottom is another trinity, of mundane activity: L=Life, D=Death, G=Gray/InnerAbsentia (God). Between the two are The Five Ways of Being: Up/Down, Left/Right, Front/Back, In/Out and On/Off, with illustrations borrowed from The Dream Analysis Calculator. To the left and right of The Five Ways of Being: B=Bad Negative, G=Good Negative, G=Good Positive and B=Bad Positive - a spectrum of possibilities.

As mentioned above, this diagram/mandala is oriented vertically with The Three Unities at the top, to appease those who want to view The Absentia as the most exalted state. But, in reality, we could rotate this mandala any old way, and it would still say the same thing - that reality is all one thing, no end of it is any better or worse than another.

Down the middle is a Double Helix, because the Quintagram that results from shaking THIS tree of life is a universal code of archetypal influence - a constellation of consciousness. Around the outside is another representation of The Current of Creation from simple to complex, with a line connecting the two Absentias.

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EXTRA CREDIT

Two Absentias? Yes... To understand, read the book All Things Are Numbers!!